~*~ ElaIsLost ~*~
Where is Ela?
| ~ About Me ~ | ~ Garden ~ | ~ Follow ~ | ~ Guestbook ~ |
JournalCast
Feed tamanotchi to support my motivation!
Feed tamanotchi to support my motivation!
Feed tamanotchi to support my motivation!
Feed tamanotchi to support my motivation!
Episode 4 - 22.07.2026:
The reading for today is about self-suggestion (even though the author himself does not present the correct wording for his subject). It lacks maturity, vocabulary, and a deep understanding of many aspects of psychology, but it hits the right points. This happens because the book was written by a plastic surgeon, and it focuses on how self-image can change our behavior and outcomes in life. It’s not a joke: the same guy who sells the idea of changing oneself materially wrote a book about changing oneself internally. So, of course, I had to take a look at this book.
Indeed, it is very outdated in its conceptualization and rather arrogant, as one might expect from a man raised in an old medical atmosphere. Psycho-Cybernetics is a book about how we can influence our unconscious self. The image of Freud’s iceberg is well-known, and, disregarding theoretical disputes, we can agree that the unconscious seems to rule, even though we try to control it. Maltz’s premise is simple: by using our rational self,the part of us we feel we can direct,we can influence the inaccessible parts of our minds. To change the unconscious, one must first change the conscious. Our thoughts, surroundings, beliefs, and actions are all available to us as tools for change.I loved the concept, and of course, it makes a lot of sense. It aligns well with cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), which has recently been highly regarded in the scientific field. However, the reading is also unsettling. For example, the author uses hypnosis to describe this type of suggestion, but hypnosis is a state related to, yet very different from, suggestion. When someone is fully hypnotized,let’s say 100%,they are essentially controlled by another person.
Their consciousness is gone, even though awareness may pervade; there is no filter. Freud rejected hypnosis for this very reason. While he initially used it on his patients, he found that no progress could be made without applying pressure to defense mechanisms, which are not accessible in a hypnotic state.To apply hypnosis incorrectly, as Maltz does, is distracting and made me lose some trust and interest in the book (as did many other flawed conceptualizations, such as comparing humans to machines, a notion long surpassed). But I kept my focus on the doctor’s experiences and insights. The core message still applies: suggestion can be powerful.
This even made me reflect on how Argentina lost its last game in the World Cup, likely due to suggestion-based limitations that only grew stronger when shared by the group. I wonder how much more successful teams could be if they embraced psychology. The masculine culture of sports often avoids such changes, centering belief on the image of a single man (in this case, the team’s trainer), who is expected to carry the magic of leadership on his shoulders. It’s a classic myth that resists approaches like science and subtle, verbal, mental, “feminine" methods.Yet such approaches could truly revolutionize the world of sports, which is so dominated by men. Sometimes I wonder how interesting it would be to occupy that space myself. Maltz provides examples to demonstrate his ideas, making it clear that exercises are not as effective as imagination. He proposes that simply imagining oneself performing certain activities can lead to more progress than physical practice. For instance, he shares examples of a pianist who learned a song by mentally rehearsing and a man who overcame his fear of public speaking when he realized it was just his imagination feeding him false information. The man could speak fluently among friends who were interested in what he had to say.
This is a key point in Maltz’s book: to change one’s self-image, one must confront incongruent beliefs. The brain rejects ideas that don’t fit with the bigger picture because, by nature, we strive to create a coherent image of the world. But the unconscious is messy,totally crazy, one could say. It contains countless incongruities. This is where our rational, accessible self comes in: to bring some sense to the chaos.Interestingly, today at work, I read a paper about external and internal attention. External attention is when an individual focuses on the goal or movement itself, rather than on internal body positions. This concept is significant in sports psychology, where external attention has been shown to be far more effective than focusing internally. I was reminded of classic movie scenes where an archer needs to hit a target, and a wise mentor advises them to focus on the goal, not the arrow. The paper strongly supports this: the more external the attention focus, the more precise the movement becomes.One experiment stood out: participants were instructed to jump as far as possible. One group was told to focus on extending their knees as quickly as possible (internal attention), while the other group was told to focus on jumping as far past the start line as possible (external attention). The group with external focus jumped, on average, 10 cm farther than the other group. Just imagine how impactful a 10 cm difference could be in the Olympics! This experiment highlights how much we limit ourselves and how powerful the right kind of focus and suggestion can be.I see this kind of "hypnosis," as Maltz would call it, in consumerism. We are constantly drawn in by suggestive images of who we are "supposed" to be, conforming unconsciously to a world we never agreed to. How much more could we achieve if we broke free from this? The current state of things dominated by violence, hierarchy, and individualism,is unsustainable. How much longer will we comply with this system of men in control? It’s time to return to the certainty our souls carry from birth: to love is not weakness. To love is to resist.
Love,
Ela
Episode 3 - Old Archive - The Child:
It is common in our modern philosophy to praise wisdom as a good quality. I feel that maybe this is one of the things humanity got it right. but at the same time we should always be much careful not to engage in a duality of good and bad towards the opposites, for the child in ourselves has also a lot to offer. We can understand our adult selves as our wisdom provider, as does the child to our energy. It is no coincidence that in this same society we consider our within child as something not to be proud of, Actually, we try to hide instead of giving it voice. Jung would always defend that for every hidden part of ourselves, something would come up to bring it up to the surface and make itself noticed. No wonder, again, that in search of defending a very mature image of ourselves, we engage assimilated actors in our jobs or around other people, while keeping impulsive behaviors, just like children. some more than others, to the extent that it can become a disease or an addiction. We are not grown without accepting how wrong, how faulty and imperfect we are. True wisdom accepts and gazes with understanding at our mistakes, making us act correctly towards it. This acceptance opens the gate for us to use the child's energy towards the things that will bring peace and help us with our objectives. Of course, we must be careful not to believe this is a control of energy, the same way we understand control as switching buttons on and off. For true control is nothing but an opening of doors for the flow of life to take its right course. So it is a bit funny, because you are indeed wiser at the acceptance of your childish self In Buddhism there is a thought that every concept includes the opposite within its truth, so you can only truly be without the denying of its opposite, which takes part into what makes it becomes what it is. You cannot be wise without accepting that you are also foolish sometimes, because without recognizing you cannot control and take part on where it acts. or they don't let go. The same way that you can't be happy without accepting sorrow, as this has a lot to do with the opening of the heart and allowing yourself to enter what hurts with the aim to be accepting, try to take a minute to breathe and recognize the imperfect parts of breathing and how it feels when you don't try to deny them. Close your eyes and focus on breathing. Maybe you feel your weight pushing down, a sharpness of breath, maybe even pain. Maybe it actually feels good too. Allow yourself to recognize whatever the sensations arise, but don't get attached to making yourself feel any specific way. Allow it to be how it is. If you are trying too much, recognize that you are trying too much. It is hard to put on words that you should just see what's going on. In written language, we feel that always something should come up after a conclusion. But there is no conclusion. It is always there. The most we can make is see that it has a face. Feel free to stop and keep your meditation for longer. Thank you.
Love,
Ela
Episode 2 - 21.07.2026:
The world is ending and we are still having a World Cup, resistance or alienation? To be honest I do not believe that there is only one answer, I had fun and kept my mind worrying about the shitshow happening around us, so I guess it depends on each of us to keep ourselves informed. Okay, bla bla bla, who wants to be bossed around? I came here for a more interesting take on everything that happened the last few days. First Argentina won against England, and we South Americans could rightfully protest against English pride, reminding them that the Malvinas are stolen. Then something interesting happened, the team played against their colonizers in the final: Spain. I thought Argentina would win for sure and we could celebrate the symbolic rise of the Global South. But something unsettling came to mind, I didn't want the disgusting Milei to win this game. I love my Argentinian boyfriend and I did cheer for Argentina to win, but inside my heart I couldn't help the feeling that it would be a win for Trump and Milei, who are spreading so much evil around the world lately. 
The game surprised everyone and I felt betrayed, how could a team that I saw playing so beautifully look like teenagers playing against a mature Spain? But I already knew the reason deep down, and that is why I wanted Spain to score in the first round: Argentina needs pressure to win, the opposite of Brazil, which needs to always be on the winning team. I do have a feeling that Spain knew this and played accordingly. Oh well, we already know the result. After my friends and I ended the stream without anything to celebrate, each going to our homes as quickly as a long game before a workday demanded, my flatmate shared the news that Spain had recently openly positioned itself pro-Palestine. She wanted us to feel better, and I thought that was sweet, because for her (and for me) that is the most important matter happening in the world right now. My football friends were upset when I tried to console them that way, asking me if I, as a Brazilian, would feel consoled by that. I remembered the photos of the dead Palestinian babies and children I saw on the news as they asked me that.
Anyway, this whole World Cup thing was a win for me, only because I got to watch the semifinal with 20 Argentinians, including my boyfriend. Each goal was a crazy flurry of hugs, screams, and a feeling that you had to be there to understand. On the first goal, two guys hugged and fell on top of me, kissing my cheek , it was funny and stressful at the same time. My boyfriend and I both kissed, full of happiness and emotion in the middle of it all. This overwhelming Argentinian atmosphere also had to be managed somehow, how did I do it before the game started, with all of them around? I befriended the cats and lay on the ground, I didn't try to appear social or anything like that. I was only worried my boyfriend would be uncomfortable by my demeanor; I was happy he didn't feel bothered at all, so I could just relax and be weird. Once the game started it was easy, I was really into watching it. However, in the middle of the game my ADHD kicked in and I knocked the bong over onto the sofa.
I felt terrible and like such a bad guest, but I had told Ivan beforehand that I could sit near him because I'd be closer to the bong. So it was really funny after the party when Ivan and I talked about all my disastrous moments and he concluded that actually he was at fault for all of them. He always makes me laugh.
I can't think of any other highlights this week since I am so tired, but I will for sure come back with other updates soon!
Love,
Ela
Epidose 1 - Old archive:
Life to me is a constant strain, an endless birth which feels hard but also is the most beautiful, amazing thing. The difficulty of being is the same of that which brings pleasure to life. They are the hard feelings the ones that hit us and make us sure to feel. They are not necessarily bad or good, they are what they are. We are made to feel, this is our capacity as humans, but no function works without use of energy and the use of its engines. We are successful once we process these emotions, that is when we feel harmonized, balanced. Events come to us, delivering suffer and joy, and we are still and with a quiet mind the moment we absorb these feelings entirely. That’s the need of an open heart. To be open to suffer, to be open to everything, so we can distinguish from the ones that are useful and not. I am well aware of the current belief that we should not be so, rather selective towards people and situations, careful about what we let in. But it is to me a dubious approach since the moment we try to avoid something we are imposing the truth of its existence, allowing it to take its part as an opposing fact in our life’s, in fact this defence of the self tends to cause immense frustration. Rater than that, a strong mind is aware of its fragility, does not deny, but recognizes what comes and goes so it can make its choices right. Like an old sage, with a big heart but a still strength. So we are forever aching, because we are forever feeling. But also this hardship is rewarding, and it becomes stronger, not in a linear way, and sometimes it does comes backwards, but it grows and makes us mature and wise. It is our sad feelings I sometimes believe, that affirm ourselves who we are. They are strong, very noticeable. Different than joyful feelings, if we pass them by, they are not lost, but find their way back. Of course they have their own ways to do that, trough irritability, anxiety, numbness. But they make sure to be noticeable, to exist and make thus us exist. They bear the affirmation of existence that cannot be denied, they use force, and thus it hurts. But we are the ones that provoke that, insisting on ignoring the delicate and subtle joy. It hurts, but they are there to guide. It makes us want a different experience, it makes us want to go away from it, so we can feel the subtle life. Letting the pain go, this pain that exists with the only purpose of extinguishing itself, is the higher embracing of the suffer. We are all capable of this. The humbleness of spirit of course needs to be awakened, it is not with force that this strong and persistent suffer goes away. But with the higher you that is inside, already humble and good for nature. We can chose to believe on it, tell ourselves I am here, and here I will forever be.
Love,
Ela